I've got

a crush on you.
get outta my head
actually. eff that
stay there
i like it.
=)

three days or rather two

This is really fucking hitting me.
All my friends old and new are going in different directions and starting new things and it's just.. amazing to see what is to come.
I mean. one of my old good friends has a jerky selling business.
THATS AWESOME!!

Everyone's leaving for college or some place to work and it's just, sad..
Really sad.
I'm just amazed at the memories, the many stories, the heart aches and the heartwarming moments. The times when i hated this town and everyone in it to the times when i couldn't imagine a better place to live. It has it's charms while having it's downsides. I just, can't believe it's slowly coming to an end. Not a complete end but a finish to a growing up point in my life. Fuck, I'm gonna miss so many things. Chilling with the likes of Mark Neely, Will, Josh, AJ, johnnie, ray, tim, john, shiet, janine, chelsea, angelique, francis, other francis, jeremy, maddy, saroo, monicha, those old intellect members, fucking alexis and evan fucking A. Members of AGI*LITY fucking shit Avo, joel, Dj, ETC. Kimi, AD, Niko, Seth, asdfdsfa, Jonald, Marky, Joseph and Joshua, fucking A. ALL of the cfc-y kids. There's just, so many people that i can't believe I've met and had meaningful conversations and lasting memories. Getting backflipped on, or having my first battle, getting tottaly jocked by chelsea, going to SD with mark and josh, walking into Muligans and ending up being dissapointed. The many households and camps that were utterly amazing. ROTC classes which made me want to blow my brains out. Dance production practice which made me love theater and dancing and all that shit. Going to Mt.High and being offered beer and weed constantly and being mistaken for the age of 24. shiiiiet Rival schools, dance competitions, Shooting competitions. Learning Guitar for the first time. Experiencing a true loss. Those many crying moments. Those many fuck yeah i feel fantastic moments.

Now it is time for me to leave the building.
Embark on this new journey of memories and friends and lovers.

*heads out the front door.

signed XD

Better Luck Tomorrow

I first watched this gem of a movie in sixth grade when i first moved back into California. This time was a rather awkward time due to the pubescent nature and my raging hormones paired with my need to find who i was since that little boy who liked hide and go seek with his cousins just wasn't going to cut it anymore in big boy middle school.

This movie stars an all Asian American cast which is still considered rare within cinemas today.

The main plot revolves around a high-school senior who is of course Asian and an overachiever. He's in the academics club, has a great job, great grades, no girlfriend, the typical over-achiever image within high-school. Soon enough the plot develops into the crazy antics high school can be. He soon be-friends his club president in which him and his two other friends make a business out of selling test scores. They get away with all of their antics due to their grades thus the phrase "our grades were our alibis" was portrayed heavily. The main character meets his love partner who is of course dating a popular Asian man from another school. Everything becomes linked within all the characters and with one thing leading to another, the main character makes a choice that affects the lives of every single character. Pretty soon all of their lives take turns into many different directions ending off in a surprising and questionable action and ending.

I'm writing this whole synopsis because... comparing it to when i watched it in sixth grade in which i thought the best part was the sex scene and the ending made me feel sad and weird. I watch it now six years later, my mind a little bit more maturer in the fact that i understand all the innuendos, allusions, and satire that is within the movie. (Oh i can't forget stereotypes)It made me sort of think about the high-school career some of us had and portrayed. It wasn't just the actions they did but it was they're true coming of age story. I think i may have been exposed to this movie quite early because it affected how my mind thought when i was in middle school. However i digress, what I'm trying to say is that, it's funny that you understand things a little more as you grow older. You don't become stupider or blinder towards modern day things. You tend to become... smarter.

This movie was my... Breakfast Club, my coming of age story.
I wonder how college is going to fare to my eventful high-school days.

Btdubs the sex scene was okay. there's much better ones out there.
IE: Halle Berry in Monster

And the ending still fucking gets to me.
>_<

Correction: Derby Loves Daphne

You've left me with such a silent world,
Where evenings are calm, but I'm restless
And my breath has become as thin as the wind.

Not even the mighty sky could fill the space you left behind
Not even when it rains.
No, nothing takes your place
Your emptiness too great to fill.

I have been holding my breath,
For too many nights in a row,
And somewhere on coastlines unknown to me
You paint your dreams,
With reds and blues and greens.
Yea you're painting daffodils by the sea,
Without me.